California Men's Gatherings presents . . .
|February 1, 2018 Volume 11, Issue 2
CMG Community News, Events of
Interest, & Marketplace Classifieds
||CMG Quick Links
Welcome to Binky's List, CMG's very own community
news publication, named in honor of one of our most
beloved elders, Al-Binky Hoch.
Did you ever wish you could use the CMG email list to
tell everyone about anything you wanted? Well that is
EXACTLY what this newsletter is for. It's NOT for CMG
events. It's for everything else.
So send us your own items: News, events of interest in
your area, items for sale, apartments for rent, jobs
wanted, personals, community links, etc.,
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|Quote of the Month
''Go into the arts. I'm not kidding.
The arts are not a way to make a living.
They are a very human way
of making life more bearable.
Practicing an art, no matter how well or badly,
is a way to make your soul grow, for heaven's sake.
Sing in the shower. Dance to the radio. Tell stories.
Write a poem to a friend, even a lousy poem.
Do it as well as you possibly can.
You will get an enormous reward.
You will have created something.''
|Events & Items of Interest
|Hiking in the Spirit (Los Angeles)
Saturday, February 3, 9 AM
Join the Agape LGBT Ministry to hike in our lovely Santa Monica Mountains. CMGers Dan and Rasheed are your hike leaders in Topanga State Park, which serves up panoramic views of Santa Monica Bay. Hike is 6.7 miles over rolling hills. Potluck afterwards in the park. There may be street parking available–be careful to read signs. Parking lot is $10. More info: (310) 254-4298. Topanga Canyon State Park, 20828 Entrada Road, Topanga CA 90290. Meet at tables off main parking lot. Please note that dogs are not allowed. 1/24/18
CalComMen Winter Community Camp
February 9-11, 2018
Starting at $179 Complete! (Come for 2, 3, or 4 days…your choice.) Come connect & engage with other caring & compassionate men-who-love-men for a full weekend escape in the pine forests and mountains above Redlands, CA. Gay, bi, trans, queer, cis, fluid and straight men 18-91+ of all colors of the rainbow, sizes, shapes differing abilities & faith traditions. Details & registration: www.calcommen.com/get_involved. One Hour from Palm Springs; Two Hours From LA/San Diego. 1/23/18
|CMG Marketplace - Part 1
Looking for a Roommate (Los Angeles)
Want responsible tenant to share house in Van Nuys. Private bed/bath, furnished (queen bed, side drawers & dresser), ceiling fan, hardwood. Laundry, yard/pool/garden, off-street parking, central AC. I work from home so would like someone with a 9-to-5 job. Prefer gay/gay-friendly male. I have dogs and cat. No smokers, heavy drinkers. Not a party house, but 420 on occasion OK. $1150/mo, $600 deposit, includes water/gas/electricity/Wi-Fi. Need references & credit check. Available now. Leave name/number, type of work you do, and your lifestyle. I will contact you to meet. Randy: (323) 236-5150 or email@example.com. 1/23/18
Looking for a Ride (Los Angeles)
Hi I am looking for a ride to CMG events in West Hollywood or Hollywood. I live in Pasadena Greater LA. I would gladly help pay for gas. It’s 2018 guys & I want to make some new friends & who knows, maybe a relationship. CMG looks like a fun group of guys doing fun things. I can be contacted by my cell# at (310) 903-8703 or by my email, firstname.lastname@example.org Thanks & Happy New Year! Ty Long 1/2/18
Gay-Tantra with Armin Heining (So Cal)
Please join me, when I will be on my 8th international USA Tour, and experience Gay-Tantra at its origins! Feb 12 in LA & Feb 13 in Palm Springs: Sampler Workshop “Contacting & Energy Exchanges” (3 hours); Feb 24-25 Workshop “Sexual Energy Massage” in San Diego (2 days). You will have a wonderful, unforgettable, sustainable, real Tantric experience! Feb 14-21 the unique Tantric Touch, Massage & Masseur Training takes place in Palm Springs! www.gay-tantra.us, email@example.com. 1/17/18
Creating Your Future (Palm Springs)
The Gandolfo Group is pleased to announce "Creating Your Future," a retreat for gay men that will be delivered in Palm Springs the first weekend of June (June 1-3, 2018). Peter Gandolfo and Craig Bradley, both certified coaches with the world-renowned Hudson Institute of Coaching, will bring together 16 men for three days of awareness-building, goal-setting, and action-planning, in a community of supportive peers. The event will take place at the Colony Palms Hotel, an historic luxury hotel in the heart of downtown Palm Springs. For full event details, please visit http://retreat.gandolfogroup.com. 1/24/18
|Did You Know . . . ?
13 Daily Habits That Are Secretly Stressing You Out
Adapted from an article by Sara Boboltz
The holidays are over but sometimes it seems that the list of things to stress us out never ends. It turns out that you might be partially to blame for your own anxiety. But we know (or we hope) you’re not purposely trying to sabotage yourself, so here’s a quick rundown of things you might be doing without realizing they’re actually making you feel
Take a deep breath and try to relax. You might be stressed because . . .
1. You haven’t laughed today.
If you can’t remember the last time you laughed so hard you were blinded by tears, you should reconsider your life choices. Laughter has been shown to relieve stress, stimulate blood flow, relax muscles, promote a healthy immune system, and relieve pain.
2. You’re not using your gym membership.
In a study on mice, those that had exercised responded to a stressful cold-water bath with a short spurt of anxiety followed by calm, suggesting brains are more equipped to deal with stress when the body has been physically active. Regular exercise, not whenever-I’m-bored-and-it’s-convenient exercise, can help you de-stress. Also, you’ll look better.
3. You’re listening to the wrong playlist.
Multiple studies have shown the relaxing benefits of listening to music. But everyone has their own musical preferences. Your piano teacher might chill out to Debussy, but maybe The Cranberries take you back to a relaxing, mid-90s kind of place. Know yourselves, guys.
4. You left that sink of dirty dishes for “tomorrow.”
Consider your cleaning habits. Were you “that” roommate in college? Would it be not uncommon to find a partially decomposed banana lying under a pile of fliers and junk mail on top of your refrigerator? Keeping your spaces tidy may not be an anxiety cure-all, but there’s evidence to suggest it can help relieve stress.
5. You’re not having enough sex.
If you’re freaking out about something, you may not have given this topic much thought, but you should! It’s the most fun stress-reliever on this list. Yep, sex not only counts as decent exercise, but it may very well help you chill out. Princeton researchers found lower stress hormones in rats allowed to copulate daily in one study, and Bonobo monkeys have long been observed to use sex as a stress management tool.
6. You’re letting your breathing get the best of you.
Quick breathing is a natural response to stressors, but unless you’re losing it over something like a saber-toothed tiger, hyperventilating over anxiety kind of defeats the purpose. Find a breathing exercise that works for you, and remember it the next time you start to worry.
7. You’re trying to face your stressors.
Valiant effort, but the truth is, within reason, you can try to avoid things that stress you out. Don’t like crowds? Then stop grocery shopping on Saturday afternoons. The Mayo Clinic says you can totally avoid specific people, too — which you’re probably already doing if you don’t like them, but now you don’t have to feel guilty about dodging whatever mouth-breathing co-worker you can’t stand.
8. You haven’t said anything nice about yourself.
Repetitive self-assurance (“Everything will be okay” or “I will not drop the baby”) has been found to be helpful in reducing anxiety. The brain is a powerful tool, so use it.
9. You’re sleeping badly.
If it’s 4:32 a.m. and you know you’ll have to peel yourself off your mattress to go to work in a few hours’ time, close out of Netflix. It’s not time for one more episode. Sticking to a regular, healthy sleep schedule doesn’t just protect you against heart disease, some cancers and a host of other chronic health problems, it can also help you feel better about yourself and your life.
10. You see time management as more of a goal than a reality.
If the sheer number of things you have to get done on any single day is overwhelming, consider how much time you devote to each task. Planning your day and prioritizing your to-dos can help you make better time-management decisions to feel more in control of your life. If internet procrastination is your weakness, this Chrome extension will track how long you spend on each site.
11. You’re saying “yes” too much.
Once in a while, it’s okay to say “no” to lighten the load of your personal responsibilities. No, sorry, you can’t drop your cousin off at the airport, because you’ve had a dinner scheduled for weeks. No, sorry, you can’t make a fruitcake for the company holiday party, because it would take too long to bake. And fruitcake is disgusting. (Mostly the latter.)
12. You’re surgically attached to your phone.
Stop that. Stop checking. You’ll be okay — see the item regarding personal mantras. Research has shown that the pressure to be constantly available to respond to emails, texts, phone calls and to know what’s going on can be too much. You may want to make a conscious effort to turn your phone and computer off for a certain amount of time each day.
13. You’ve just achieved some major goal.
…but for some reason you’re still freaking out! Yikes. (We can only hope you’re knocking out life goals on a daily basis, anyway.) Research has shown that “compassionate” goals — things that benefit others along with yourself — reduce anxiety post-achievement more so than “self-image” goals in college students. In other words, be a better person and you might just feel better, too.
Bonus: If you need some extra stress relief, chew some gum, find a puppy to spend some time with, or channel your inner Brit with a hot cup of tea.
Now isn’t that better?
The original article with links to supporting info:
|CMG Marketplace - Part 2
Cruise with us to Bora Bora in luxury
CMGers Tom Taffel and his partner of 46 years, Bill Repp, have organized 73, six-star, ultra-luxury, group cruises at exclusive group rates on the world’s highest rated (small) ships. Come cruise with us, for the 17th time on the 320 passenger, m/s “Paul Gauguin” from Tahiti to Bora Bora, Moorea, and beyond. You'll receive a 10% group discount, $300pp shipboard credit, and more on our retirement cruise. Cruise, airfare from LAX, gratuities, premium spirits/gourmet wines, and water sports are included. Rates/itinerary: www.TomsGroupCruises.com, or contact Tom & Bill at (415) 566-7673, Tom@TomTaffel.com. 1/16/18
BA-MEN (So Cal)
BA-MEN (Beach Areas Men Enjoying Naturism), a men's naturist/nudist club in Orange County, Long Beach, and nearby, invites all 18+ men! Join us in Palm Springs May 25-June 1! We're have a timeshare that sleeps 6, and have a car for 4-5 total leaving Garden Grove on 5/25. Donations only if staying/going with us! Feb. Events include a massage workshop, "spa@home day", movies, games, & more! See our calendar:: http://BA-MEN.Org/calendar/. Short-notice events added often, check the calendar & forums: http://BA-MEN.Org/yahoo/, and http://BA-MEN.Org/facebook/. Visit BA-MEN: http://BA-MEN.Org. Questions? BAMENClub@GMail.com. And see our newsletter: http://BA-MEN.Org/newsletters/current/. 1/23/19
Holistic Psychological Healing and Wellness (Los Angeles)
Psychotherapy with Neil Schierholz PsyD for individuals, couples, adult families, and groups. Schedule a free initial phone consultation at DrSchierholz.com. Lower-fee options available with my interns. 1/16/18
Sensual Massage by Tall, Bearish, Nurturing Man (Los Angeles)
Come and relax in a Zen-like atmosphere. Take an hour out of your day to enjoy being pampered. Strong intuitive hands. You create the type of massage you would like. You will also enjoy the soft music and candles. In a Van Nuys house with a private room. Shower and easy parking available. Large oversized massage table, and clean sheets. Times available: after 6pm on weekdays. On weekends, call to see what I have available. Cost is $85 for over an hour. Book your appointment with Randy (323) 236-5150. 1/20/18
Freshen Your Photo (statewide)
“That’s my husband’s dad in this classic 1940s photo, but the sky’s a mess and the horse’s leg is scraped.” Not anymore! Through www.FreshenYourPhoto.com, longtime CMG member Milo Shapiro saves old pictures, improves current ones, and even removes people/things from photos. Email him photos for a free estimate. What photo in your desk drawer or desktop folder needs
fixing? Wish decades old photos looked fresh or had color? Sun bleaching, water damage, scratches or tears on old shots? Email him photos for a free estimate. 1/2/18
Confused by Technology? (Los Angeles)
IT Acquisition & Services (Pasadena, LA-area): Free consultation, $20 for 20 minutes. Let me help you navigate the IT issues you are facing today, so that you can enjoy your technology tomorrow. Wanting a new gadget or a new pc/mac for Xmas?? Receiving errors or warnings?? I have seen most everything and can make recommendations to fit your budget. Maybe a Chromebook (http://www.google.com/chromebook) is best? I will
always be helpful for any decision-making. (http://xkcd.com/627/). Leave me (Harold Felton) a message at (626) 398-6864 anytime, day or night. 1/23/18
Explorations in Intimacy & Masculinity (LA & Palm Springs)
FEB 2-4 MenInContact Workshop “Building Erotic Intimacy” (LA) (Details at https://www.calcommen.com/workshops), MAR 2-4 MenInContact “Moving Into Intimacy Workshop” (Palm Springs), MAR 23-25 MenInContact Workshop “The Erotic Intensive” (LA), APR 13-15 MenInContact Workshop “Reclaiming the Magic of Your Gay Power” (LA), JUN 1-3
MenInContact Workshop “Moving Into Intimacy” (LA), JUN 22-24 MenInContact Workshop “The Erotic Intensive” (LA), AUG 10-12 MenInContact Workshop “Can You Really Be You” (LA), OCT 5-7 MenInContact Workshop “Intentional Massage: Heart to Hand Intimacy” (LA). For details & registration, email: Info@CalComMen.com. 1/23/18
|Links of Interest
LGBT Social & Recreational Organizations
CMG (California Men's Gatherings)
OUT4FUN (Gay Calendar of Events)
SAGA-LA (Los Angeles Gay Ski & Snowboard Club)
SAGA-SD (San Diego Gay Ski & Snowboard Club)
APGF (Asian/Pacific Gays & Friends)
POZabilities (San Diego Social Network)
GLTA (Gay & Lesbian Tennis Association)
IGBO (International Gay Bowling Organization)
IAGSDC (International Association of Gay Square Dance Clubs)
Fun and Games Club
Arriba (Ski & Snowboard Club for Gays & Lesbians)
LA Blades Hockey Club
LANG (Los Angeles Nude Guys)
CMEN (California Men Enjoying Naturism)
BA-MEN (Beach Areas Men Enjoying Naturism - for O.C., Long Beach, & South Bay)
Asian Pacific Islander Pride Council (Facebook Page)
Satrang (South Asian Queers of Southern California)
Black & White Men Together (Southern California)
Radical Faeries LA
LARF (Los Angeles Radical Faeries)
Menstuff Events Calendar
A Men's Project
So CA Bondage Club
East Bay Network
Men's Massage Network (Los Angeles)
Southern California Gay & Lesbian Club (and Friends!)
Southern California Cycling Group
Los Angeles LGBT Center
San Francisco LGBT Community Center
San Diego LGBT Community Center
Sacramento LGBT Center
Palm Springs LGBT Center
Antelope Valley OUTtreach Center
LA LGBT Center Senior Services
AIDS Project LA
Shanti Orange County
Project Angel Food
Project Chicken Soup (Los Angeles County)
Hollywood Free Clinic
SCA (Sexual Compulsives Anonymous)
L.A. Youth Supportive Services (Teen and Young Adult Hotline)
Southern Oregon Pride
Lotus Rising Project
Pacific Center (Berkeley)
Red Circle Project
One (National Gay and Lesbian Archives)
Pop Luck Club
L.A. County 211
Mankind Project Los Angeles
Mankind Project San Diego
The Discovery Community (Bay Area)
Gay For Good
HSD (Homeless Shelters)
UCSF Alliance Health Project (San Francisco)
The Lavender Effect
North County LGBTQ Resource Center (Oceanside)
HIV Long-term Survivors
Human Rights Campaign
Stonewall Democrats (Los Angeles)
Log Cabin Republicans
Miscellaneous Organizations & Listings
Gay Business Directory (LGBT Yellow Pages)
Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce (L.A.)
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CMG Mission Statement
California Men's Gatherings (CMG) fosters a safe, supportive, welcoming community
where men challenge themselves to develop
their emotional, spiritual, social, intellectual and physical lives -
with as much fun as possible along the way!
We encourage you to read CMG's Core Values Statement as well!
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