California Men's Gatherings presents . . .
January 1, 2019                                          Volume 12, Issue 1

Binky's List
CMG Community News, Events of
Interest, & Marketplace Classifieds

Dear , CMG Quick Links

Welcome to Binky's List, CMG's very own community
 news publication, named in honor of one of our most
 beloved elders, Al-Binky Hoch.
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 EXACTLY what this newsletter is for. It's NOT for CMG
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Events & Items of Interest

Color Bonita (Los Angeles)
January 19, 2019, 7 - 10 PM
“Color Bonita” is a new media art performance piece intimately connecting audiences with the queer Latino experience around family, religion, machismo, and homophobia. Artist Christopher Ramirez, in collaboration with Phoenix Toews, combines sound, images, and interviews to illuminate the complexity of growing up gay in the Latino culture as an act of witnessing and testimony. Los Angeles LGBT Center, Village at Ed Gould Plaza, Renberg Theater, 1125 N McCadden Pl, Los Angeles California 90038. RSVP for free: Facebook:     12/16/18

Eros Circle (Palm Springs)
Join the heart-centered men of CalComMen at the January Eros Circle. Eros Circle is a small group of men, who meet as often as possible, to brush up on and practice new sensual massage & invigorating breathwork skills, to re-connect with old friends, and to make new ones. The day includes structured and facilitated experiences in a safe, supportive, and confidential space, plus a hearty potluck lunch! Open to all men-who-love men, especially first-timers. Sunday, January 20th, 10 AM - 4 PM, Palm Springs, $40. RSVP by email to, or call (323) 314-5420 with any questions.     12/13/18

CalComMen (So Cal)
Would you like to be part of a real-time community where you are welcomed regardless of age, color, size or shape? CalComMen is a radically diverse and inclusive community of over 11,000 men-who-love-men – gay, bi, trans, queer, fluid, cis, & straight. Attend our weekly, Community Coffees in Encinitas & Palm Springs, monthly Heart Circles in LA and Palm Springs, and classes and workshops.  We are the only heart-centered SoCal men's community that is drug, alcohol, smoke, and electronics-free, and  warmly welcomes all men-who-love-men.
Join us at, and send your name to     12/13/18

CMG Marketplace - Part 1

Personal Assistant Wanted (Los Angeles)
Very part-time personal/professional assistant needed for CMGer, disabled professional man.  I work from home in the Universal City/Cahuenga Pass area.  Administrative duties include light filing & typing, running local errands in your car, rarely more than a mile, (my local Ralphs, Trader Joe’s, the post office, & LA Fitness, etc.). We can create your schedule together.  Wage is $15 per hour. Contact Dr. Tony at (323) 351–4531.     12/24/18

In Search of Lost Lives (statewide)
Announcing the publication of In Search of Lost Lives, Michael Goddart's unique memoir in which he depicts precise, fascinating details of life in lost worlds and spiritual experiences and evolution. "… a veritable epic of reincarnation literature …" -Kirkus Reviews. Of particular interest may be the twelve "homophile" lives, including the three Great Loves Goddart enjoyed in 1920s London, Viking Age Denmark, and Ancient Greece. Also, discover the Inspiration in Spiritual Revolution: A Seeker's Guide–. "A book of true wisdom. Save yourself pain and read it." -Bernie Siegel, MD,  Love, Medicine & Miracles. Kindly visit     12/4/18

Cleaning & Helping Offered (Los Angeles)

My name's David. If you happen to need someone to clean your place or office weekly or every other week I'm available to help you with that. Or, if you need help with the Internet or using programs like Excel & Word, I can help you with that too. Email me at or text me at (818) 714-0722 for more info.     12/23/18

Heart2Heart Touch Workshops (Los Angeles)
Monthly Heart2Heart Touch Workshops begin in 2019 at the LGBT Center’s Village at Ed Gould Plaza. The activity is a safe space for men to connect with men using supportive, nourishing, non-sexual touch.  In structured fun activities, fully clothed participants experience what it feels like to  be safely held, to receive warm hugs, to have their heads tenderly stroked, or to dance a slow dance cheek to cheek.  The workshops establish healthy boundaries, creating guidelines for safety, communication, and support. John Soroczak LMFT, facilitates, Information at and     12/3/18

Attention Bisexuals: Relationship Wanted (statewide)
Single white female, 36 years, slim attractive, romantic, loving, caring, active. Likes travel, home life, cooking, music, sports, gardening and nature. I would like to meet a caring, understanding, honest, mature man, with a good sense of humor and a loving heart for long term relationship leading to a possible marriage. Will relocate. Write me an email  or  you can also call/text me on (347) 590-4637. Anita.     12/2/18

Did You Know . . . ?

       The Gay Man’s Manifesto
For when you need a little reminder…
                                                 by Andrew Pemberton

As the writer of Dudes, an original series targeted towards gay men, I hear a lot of stories about misadventures in sex, dating, love, etc. The following list is a little reminder for everyone to refer to, no matter what life throws at them.

Sleep around until it gets old. It will get old. Wear a condom. Know your sexual likes and limits. Explore your sexuality. Be safe doing it. Dick size matters–sometimes. Buy sex toys. A Fleshlight will change your life. Don’t have sex on the first date. Or the second date. Or the third date. Get to know him–it’s fun. If you’re not sexually compatible with your lover, it may be time to find another lover. Learn your body. Learn what you like in bed. Then tell the other guy. Yes, you’re probably doing it wrong in bed, but so is he. Everyone wins. Threesomes are great.

Date! Stop looking for a husband. Not everyone is going to be attracted to you. You already knew that, right? You’ll date married men and not know it. It’s not your fault. It’s your fault is you continue to date the aforementioned married man. Meet men in real life. Hook-up apps aren’t real life. Meet men at the gym. At least you know what they look like naked…

Your boyfriend may cheat on you. How you handle it is up to you. You may cheat on your boyfriend. How he handles it is up to him. Be honest with the guy you’re dating. Don’t take away his choices. Don’t let him take away your choices. Don’t minimize your relationships. Your boyfriend/husband/partner is a huge part of your life. Treat him as if he exists. Talk to your boyfriend/husband/partner. If you push him away, you’ll push him out the door. Relationships are hard, constant work. If you’re too lazy to tend the garden, don’t waste his time. Open relationships aren’t for everyone. If you cheat on your last three boyfriends, you’re the problem, not them. You’re the common denominator. Get a therapist.

Know your limit with alcohol. Three beers, good. Six beers, bad? Know your limit. You’re too old for cocaine, ecstasy, etc. Yes, you’re too damn old for that shit. You’re not obligated to have anal sex every time you have sex. Try mutual masturbation and dirty talk. That’s fun, too. And safe. Stay healthy. Get tested.


You’re getting older every day. It’s okay. You’re going to lose your hair. Your erections will take a little time to pop up with age. Your pubic hair will turn gray. Your muscles will sag. Yup, your balls will sag, too. Yes, we know that you’re dyeing your hair. Plastic surgery is not your friend. Everyone knows and, yes, they’re talking about it. The gym is your friend–sorry. You aren’t required to grow old with someone. You aren’t required to get married. You aren’t required to have children. You will have a midlife crisis. Don’t throw away your whole life for a few bad months.

Your friends will be your support system. Don’t sleep with them. Maybe once. No more than once. Find a favorite bar. Become a regular. It’s not a bad thing. Turn off your phone every now and then. Saying “no” is a good thing. Move beyond vodka soda and vodka cranberry–you’re not eighteen. Find your style and make it your own. Don’t be a carbon copy of your friends. Do you want to be a scene boy? Do you have to live in the gayborhood? Find a gay friendly doctor. You shouldn’t have to feel as if you’re being judged by your doctor. Don’t apologize for your life. Be open and out at work. It’ll change your life and your co-workers’ view of gay people. Get out of town every now and then. Join a gay sports team, cooking class, or wine tasting club. Meet people in real life.

You are in control of your happiness. Be kind to yourself. Be kind to your friends. Get a therapist. Your friends can only do so much. Have a party from time to time. Celebrate life. If you’re not one for marching in the streets for gay rights, donate money to the cause. Yes, you are required to do something. Stop blaming everyone else for your unhappiness.

The Gay Man’s Manifesto was written by Andrew Pemberton-Fowler. Andrew is the executive producer and writer of the web series Dudes.


CMG Marketplace - Part 2

Freshen Your Photo (statewide)
Can we get the words off my T-shirt?  And make the ground prettier?” Done! Through, longtime CMG member Milo Shapiro saves old pictures, improves current ones, and even removes people/things from photos.  Email him photos for a free estimate. What photo in your desk drawer or desktop folder needs fixing? Wish decades old photos looked fresh or had color? Sun bleaching, water damage, scratches or tears on old shots? Email Milo your photo for a free estimate.     12/2/18

Sensual Massage by Tall, Bearish, Nurturing Man (Los Angeles)
Come and relax in a Zen-like atmosphere. Take an hour out of your day to enjoy being pampered. Strong intuitive hands. You create the type of massage you would like. You will also enjoy the soft music and candles. In a Van Nuys house with a private room. Shower and easy parking available. Large oversized massage table, and clean sheets. Times available: after 6 PM on weekdays. On weekends, call to see what I have available. Cost is $85 for over an hour.  Book your appointment with Randy (323) 236-5150.     12/20/18

Massage and Yoga (San Francisco)
CMGer and CMT Brian Swager offers serious, therapeutic, healing bodywork with a warm, sensual approach incorporating Swedish, deep tissue, shiatsu, lomi lomi, craniosacral, and Body Electric style tantric techniques. Warm, quiet, clean studio, quality table, Sacred Earth lotion, shower. Also available for private yoga sessions, naked or clothed. Additional info:  (415) 551-7866     12/22/18

Links of Interest

LGBT Social & Recreational Organizations
CMG (California Men's Gatherings)
OUT4FUN (Gay Calendar of Events)
SAGA-LA (Los Angeles Gay Ski & Snowboard Club)
SAGA-SD (San Diego Gay Ski & Snowboard Club)
Great Outdoors
APGF (Asian/Pacific Gays & Friends)
POZabilities (San Diego Social Network)
GLTA (Gay & Lesbian Tennis Association)
IGBO (International Gay Bowling Organization)
IAGSDC (International Association of Gay Square Dance Clubs)
Fun and Games Club
Arriba (Ski & Snowboard Club for Gays & Lesbians)
LA Blades Hockey Club
Gay Outdoors
LANG (Los Angeles Nude Guys)
CMEN (California Men Enjoying Naturism)
BA-MEN (Beach Areas Men Enjoying Naturism - for O.C., Long Beach, & South Bay)
Asian Pacific Islander Pride Council (Facebook Page)
Satrang (South Asian Queers of Southern California)
Black & White Men Together (Southern California)
FaeLA (radical Faeries Los Angeles)
Menstuff Events Calendar
So CA Bondage Club
East Bay Network
Men's Massage Network (Los Angeles)
Southern California Gay & Lesbian Club (and Friends!)
Southern California Cycling Group
The Billys

Unusual Attitudes
Jonathan's Circle (Fresno)
(San Francisco)

Community Organizations
Los Angeles LGBT Center
San Francisco LGBT Community Center
Oakland LGBT Community Center
San Diego LGBT Community Center
Sacramento LGBT Center
Palm Springs LGBT Center
Antelope Valley OUTtreach Center
LA LGBT Center Social Services & Housing
AIDS Project LA
Shanti Orange County
Lifeworks Mentoring
Project Angel Food
Project Chicken Soup (Los Angeles County)
Hollywood Sunset Free Clinic
SCA (Sexual Compulsives Anonymous)
L.A. Youth Supportive Services (Teen and Young Adult Hotline)
Southern Oregon Pride
Lotus Rising Project
Pacific Center (Berkeley)
Red Circle Project
One (National Gay and Lesbian Archives)
Pop Luck Club
Trevor Project
L.A. County 211
Mankind Project Los Angeles
Mankind Project San Diego
The Discovery Community (Bay Area)
Gay For Good
Starland Community
HSD (Homeless Shelters)
UCSF Alliance Health Project (San Francisco)
The Lavender Effect
North County LGBTQ Resource Center (Oceanside)
HIV Long-term Survivors

Wildwood Retreat

Political Organizations
Equality California
Human Rights Campaign
Stonewall Democrats (Los Angeles)
Log Cabin Republicans

Miscellaneous Organizations & Listings
Gay Business Directory (LGBT Yellow Pages)
Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce (L.A.)


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